Every day, I thank God for 2 things:
1) My salvation through Jesus Christ. That speaks for itself.
2) My status as a boy mom. Why? Back in the day, I dreamed of being a boy-only mom because I enjoyed being a big sis to my little brother so much. Now, I determined that being a boy mom made me immune to dealing with a teenage girl having PMS in my home 24/7 (sorry, no one gets to have monthly mood swings in my house but ME!) and, more importanly, boy mom-hood provided a protection shield from the Disney Princess Cult.
Or did it?
Let me set the scene: the Love Bug bit John this school year. He frequently refers to this precious girl as a "Princess" and told me that he is the "Prince." I found this crush adorable and congratulated myself for teaching my son to have good taste in choosing crushes because this little girl is beautiful and has a sweet disposition. The fact that I adore the girl's mom helps, too.
John received an invitation to Princess Crush's birthday party. I told him the good news over his Saturday morning cartoons. His face beamed when I told him he was going to the party. Then came the serious talk:
Me: "John, we have to get a gift for Princess Crush. What would you like to get her?"
J: "A Thomas train." (In all fairness, I must disclose that Princess Crush likes Thomas trains. I believe this factoid had a lot to do with John crushing on her).
Me: "Well, ok, but would you like to get her something with princesses on it, since she likes princesses?" This will be easy, I thought. A set of sparkly jewelry and a tiara and we'll be set.
J: Looks away from his cartoons and stares at me with a serious expression, "Yes. A dress. A princess dress. That's what I want to give her."
Faster than you can say "bibbity-bobbity-boo," this boy mom prepared for hand-to-hand combat with the Disney Princess Cult. Truth be told, I'd prefer lightsaber combat with Darth Vader. My odds against the Dark Side of the Force beat my odds against the Princess Cult, for sure.
Rationalizing that even Cinderella had a Fairy Godmother to help her out, I called in my own Fairy Godmother. I needed some insight into my enemy, I mean, where to procure this dress for my son's crush. My Fairy Godmother was none other than Cousin T., a former-princess-now-princess-mom. She was the best person to inform me of how to find such a gift, and told me to check Target or Walmart.
I scanned online for some dresses and showed John a few:
Me: "Is this what you want to give Princess Crush?"
John: "Yes, it HAS to be pink. She needs a pink dress."
OK, off to the battlefield we go. First to one store, which yielded no luck. Then a second store. We found a few dresses, but no pink dresses. I tried to convince John that a blue or green dress would work well, but John was adamant: Princess Crush needed a PINK dress.
Back to the car. I pulled into the parking lot of the final store on our quest. We walk in...and there it was, a pink princess dress. The last pink princess dress in the store flew off the shelf and into my cart before it turned into a pumpkin. John approved, "Yes, Mommy, this is beautiful!" and I checked out.
Fortunately, Princess Crush loved her gift. Her smile of appreciation made the quest worthwhile, and I survived the battle with the Disney Princess Cult.
I'd still rather take on Darth Vader.